Author Topic: To the FEMALES in the house  (Read 16420 times)

Offline rockatear

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #30 on: August 26, 2005, 02:31:20 AM »
Question to the women: From your standpoint have you ever received special treatment because of your gender?

I've received different treatment because of my gender and none that I think is special.  The guys might start laughing at first, but when I discover what I need to do, there's not so much laughter.  Sometimes, the new guys will come out swinging because I need to be taken seriously.  I have the most fun with people who respect themselves and aren't carrying around a lot of fear be they male or female.

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For example in a class and they pair all the guys w/guys and the girls w/girls? How does that make you feel? Do you care?

When we have an all rank class we do a rotation line so that you perform the exercise with whatever rank or sex comes through the rotation.  Other times we can choose whoever we want to pair off with, but the drills often call to switch partners so that you're pairing off with lots of different people.  And then there are times we're specifically told to pair off with like rank, but rotation is always constant and you're expected to get a different partner.

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Isn't it more than likely it will be a male that attacks us in the streets? With that being said than why do we feel the need to pair women w/women? 

I don't know that we "feel the need to pair women w/women".  In mixed schools I often see people paired off mostly according to rank divisions--beginners, intermediates, etc.  In my school, which is majorly women-led and too, with feminist philosophy, you're not going to have a huge number of men take class and if they do, they don't stay very long.  The men that do stay are incredibly strong men.  Imagine starting your martial arts in an arena where a large majority of women can kick your butt and you know it and they know it.  In a different culture that might not mean anything.  In America, it means a hell of a lot.  So just as a woman can be challenged in a class full of men...dealing with stereotypes and prejudgements of what she can and cannot do against a man, the reverse is also true when a man is in a class full of women; both must overcome their pre-conceived notions of what is and isn't acceptable behavior and how that may interfere with saving their lives in a fight.

Sifu Eddie at Solis Martial Arts has a mixed school although the men outnumber the women.  When my oldest son started tournaments, in his early teens, in one tournament he had to fight a girl for first place.  Because he trained mostly with guys and because he had been taught that he was not to hit girls (he was to walk away or hold them at bay if he couldn't get away) he was confused and he lost the fight.  Now, he might have lost it anyway, but had he sparred more with girls as seriously as he did with boys, he would have had a better chance overall.   Later down the road when Hand to Hand had open sparring, a couple of those times my son used to come and spar with us.  By then, he was in his heyday of being very male, very egotistical and also excelling in his matches in tournaments.  Anyway, he began to put some things in perspective, like the adage "expect the unexpected" and also a respect for the fighting/sparring abilities of women.  Actually, this kind of brings up some good memories as both my guys hit teen-hood full petal and throughout those years I didn't mind chasing them with a sword or staff to get my point across. :D

with respect,

Our children are watching us...
Shirley Phelps, blue blelt, Hand to Hand Kajukenbo Self-Defense Center, Oakland, CA, www.handtohandkajukenbo.com, Gaylord Method, Chief Head Instructors:  Sifus Jen Resnick and Sonya Richardson

Offline Serene

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #31 on: August 26, 2005, 04:43:01 PM »
I hope this post was worth while for you as it was for me. :D

We learned about each others training likes and dislikes.

Hopefully at the next class, seminar or tournament our words written here will be put into action. I believe it's important that your training and talk match each other. ;D

Enjoy your training. 8)

Soifua,
Sifu Serene Terrazas
Head Instructor
Terrazas Kajukenbo
American Canyon, Ca.

Offline ksdiwhite

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #32 on: February 11, 2006, 12:52:57 PM »
Question to the women: From your standpoint have you ever received special treatment because of your gender?

  Yes!!! It drives me crazy!!! Especially when guys go reeeaaaallllyyyyy easy on us because they assume that we can't handle it, or maybe they're following some societal norm that says not to hit girls. I appreciate that and I appreciate being respected, but I'm drawn to kajukenbo because it is very rough and hands on. We need conditioning too!!

For example in a class and they pair all the guys w/guys and the girls w/girls? How does that make you feel? Do you care?

Yes, they do segregate us alot in my school. The reasoning is that they want to watch out for sexual harassment, which in some cases I feel is appropriate. Some techniques, in grappling for example, could be misconstrued as sexual. However, it is rediculous because as a woman, I feel that I'm more vulnerable to being attacked, raped, or mugged by a male. So, wouldn't it make sense to pair us with men who are bigger than us to get us used to their bodies? At the same time, I love training with some of the women in my class. They're hardcore and we train just as hard as the guys do. I feel that there needs to be a good balance. After working with only women for some time, I feel awkward when I train with men because their bodies are so different.

Isn't it more than likely it will be a male that attacks us in the streets? With that being said than why do we feel the need to pair women w/women? 

My sentiments exactly.

I'm so glad I found this website....
~Cathy~


Offline KajuJKDFighter

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #33 on: February 11, 2006, 01:15:08 PM »
At my school, women and men are mixed no separation. The women bang with the men and the women, just who ever is up next.  The fact is women will hardly ever fight another women, but maybe a man and I want my gals ready to go.........
GM John E Bono DC
9th Degree Grand Master Gaylord Method Kajukenbo
Full Instructor-Hartsell's Jeet Kune Do Grappling Assoc
Chief Instructor Bono's Jeet Kune Do/Kajukenbo
Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them a desire,a dream,a vision

Offline kadena

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #34 on: February 11, 2006, 06:08:21 PM »
ksdiwhite said "The reasoning is that they want to watch out for sexual harassment ..." 

Is this a frequent problem or does it happen once in a blue moon? Anybody else have problems with this at their school?
Janette, green belt, Gaylord Method, Seven Star Women's Kung Fu

Offline KajuJKDFighter

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #35 on: February 11, 2006, 07:34:37 PM »
I've been teaching 20 years in the bay area and have never seen or heard of it in my school or schools I'm affiliated with.
GM John E Bono DC
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Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them a desire,a dream,a vision

Offline Mark Dinkel

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #36 on: February 20, 2006, 10:00:23 AM »
"In my school, which is majorly women-led and too, with feminist philosophy, you're not going to have a huge number of men take class and if they do, they don't stay very long." -

Is that because they are treated "special" or differently? I wonder.

This was a neat thread, and I appreciate the insights I have otherwise been missing with respect to some of the issues addressed. I hope I can apply them as appropriate.

I am not FEMALE so I hope you do not mind the post here.

My life I have been trained not to hit women. In my first Kaju school, we were not allowed to use women as uke in the monkey line. In my current school, the genders blend and it is a separation of ranks. I believe I do not hold back as much with women of rank. There is no need to, they are trained.

But my phone keeps ringing so I guess I better start working for the day instead of reading at the cafe.
« Last Edit: February 20, 2006, 10:20:37 AM by Mark Dinkel »
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Offline KajuJKDFighter

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #37 on: February 20, 2006, 10:17:17 AM »
I believe your right Mark, they are most likely treated differently, though maybe not on purpose.  Many more men then women seek the arts so schools are usually dominated numbers wise with men.  There has been a bit of a shift, but it's up to us male instructors to encourage the females to train and treat the same as the men and the same with the female instructors. Everyone could use the training for safety, focus, health...etc.......
GM John E Bono DC
9th Degree Grand Master Gaylord Method Kajukenbo
Full Instructor-Hartsell's Jeet Kune Do Grappling Assoc
Chief Instructor Bono's Jeet Kune Do/Kajukenbo
Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them a desire,a dream,a vision

Offline rockatear

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #38 on: February 20, 2006, 10:02:32 PM »
"In my school, which is majorly women-led and too, with feminist philosophy, you're not going to have a huge number of men take class and if they do, they don't stay very long." -

Is that because they are treated "special" or differently? I wonder.

I don't think we treat men special or differently than any other new member  of our school.  We do have a few men who have attained their Black Belts in the name of our school and our teachers.  However, it is my opinion, other than the men who leave because they are moving, or because of an illness (their own or a family member), the men that move on either don't like the school or as a I mentioned earlier:

"...Imagine starting your martial arts in an arena where a large majority of women can kick your butt and you know it and they know it.  In a different culture that might not mean anything.  In America, it means a hell of a lot.  So just as a woman can be challenged in a class full of men...dealing with stereotypes and prejudgements of what she can and cannot do against a man, the reverse is also true when a man is in a class full of women; both must overcome their pre-conceived notions of what is and isn't acceptable behavior and how that may interfere with saving their lives in a fight." 

Just my take on it.

Our children are watching us...
Shirley Phelps, blue blelt, Hand to Hand Kajukenbo Self-Defense Center, Oakland, CA, www.handtohandkajukenbo.com, Gaylord Method, Chief Head Instructors:  Sifus Jen Resnick and Sonya Richardson

Offline KajuJKDFighter

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #39 on: February 21, 2006, 01:05:43 AM »
I've been familiar with your school since the early '90's through Coleen. At some points there were over 300 students yet only a handful of males, this statistically is very unlikely unless something else is keeping them out or driving them out.  Maybe this can be part of your journey in the arts Shirley, to figure this out since it will surely helpsothers....
GM John E Bono DC
9th Degree Grand Master Gaylord Method Kajukenbo
Full Instructor-Hartsell's Jeet Kune Do Grappling Assoc
Chief Instructor Bono's Jeet Kune Do/Kajukenbo
Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them a desire,a dream,a vision

Offline rockatear

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #40 on: February 21, 2006, 11:47:05 PM »
Sigung John,

You are probably more familiar with the history of Hand to Hand than I am.  Having said that, I think it's an interesting subject to explore.  When I look at Destiny Arts-- our off shoot for children and youth with a mixture of performing arts and martial arts, there doesn't seem to be that great of a difference in terms of male and female participants.  I do think that a school that is historically a woman-led school with the majority of students being female (and continues to be so) does have something to do with the reluctance of males to join our school when our area has tons of schools to train in the martial arts and quite a few of them being Kajukenbo schools.  Your suggestion about this possibly being part of my journey has given me some ideas and thoughts to mull about and not a few ideas to write about.

Respectfully,

Shirley Phelps, blue blelt, Hand to Hand Kajukenbo Self-Defense Center, Oakland, CA, www.handtohandkajukenbo.com, Gaylord Method, Chief Head Instructors:  Sifus Jen Resnick and Sonya Richardson

Offline KajuJKDFighter

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Re: To the FEMALES in the house
« Reply #41 on: February 22, 2006, 12:28:25 AM »
Great... now let's see where it goes, the best of luck on this.........Peace
GM John E Bono DC
9th Degree Grand Master Gaylord Method Kajukenbo
Full Instructor-Hartsell's Jeet Kune Do Grappling Assoc
Chief Instructor Bono's Jeet Kune Do/Kajukenbo
Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them a desire,a dream,a vision